Childhood is probably the most significant time when we are being given a dose of what we need rather than what we want. Our lives, especially in the early days, is under the control of someone else. From being put to bed for an afternoon nap, being told you cannot go to certain events or hang out with certain people. The decision of what you need is not your choice, but it is exactly what we need.
In adult life, we tend to self-sabotage with too much of this and too much of that and remain way too long in environments which do not foster our happiness, self-worth or growth. Why is it so hard to parent ourselves?
We are full of advice and ideas for others, having an opinion on what someone else should or shouldn’t do, but when it comes to ourselves the excuses kick in. It’s so hard to diet, moderate drinking, go to the gym and the big ones are leave a job or relationship.
If you can manage to bypass the excuses and take a dose of ‘it’s not what you want it’s what you need’, this path will dramatically change the course of your life for the better.
Everyone who changes their job and finds rewarding employment discovers they are so much more productive and happy.
Ask anyone who has left a relationship which was not working how they felt once they bypassed the excuses and left, they will chorus ‘ecstatic’. What does a not working relationship look like? In my opinion not being able to communicate, sleeping in separate rooms, arguing most of the time, not seeing eye to eye, made to feel guilty, domestic violence, being put down, controlled verbally and suffering physical abuse. Wishing and hoping whilst continuing to do nothing will not bring change. Albert Einstein’s famous quote: “The definition of insanity, doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result”.
So how to give yourself a dose of what you need? It is very simple ‘do it’! Everything has a knack of working out or find someone trained to help you with your specific need.