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Agree to Disagree

How can you make a break-up easier on the children?

Act4Tomorrow has recently noticed a positive trend from parents who want to work out their parenting plan amicably, putting the needs of the children first. Couples are agreeing to disagree when it comes to the decisions of shared care.

Many wonderful parents are putting their differences aside, for a moment, to draw up a private parenting plan. Why? Because it is fair on everyone involved, especially the children. You can move on and out of your break-up quicker reducing the negative impact for all. And the bonus is it will save you a small fortune on costs.

Remember your children are not divorcing your ex, they will stay very much a part of the other parent’s life, so make this work for all of you.

With separation being for more accepted by our society, it no longer carries the negative stigma it did of being from a split family or being part of a blended family. With this acceptance many other past dogmas like the children should remain with the Mother have had to evolve. Our society’s acceptance of separation has meant that shared care means more access for Dad’s. 50/50 shared care is becoming more popular.

What are your options?

Options 1. You scream and shout, demand what you want, deny access, see a mediator but do not agree, engage solicitors, the next18 months+ of your life back and forth getting phycology reports and in and out of the court process, spending a fortune on court writers, mediators, legal costs and end up with the decision being made by someone else – the judge, ending up with a document which if you wanted to make changes or the other party does not adhere to – return back to court.

Option 2. As soon as you know your relationship is over and if you are still talking, work out between you what best suits the children’s needs and how it will work practically for everyone. Perhaps write out a plan for an interim period, until everything else settles.

Option 3. Engage the services of a Separations Specialist for a better way to separate. They will work with both of you on your private parenting plan and your financial separation. They manage your whole matter, communicating and working for both of you, unbiased to keep your matter amicable and on task. Have your children and financial matters resolved in half the time by working with a team to find alternative solutions. Save yourselves the emotional nightmare and tens of thousands of dollars on fees.

Option 4. The traditional method working with two separate lawyers who will correspond back and forth presenting your offers until either a conclusion or off to court.