If you are thinking about separating or have actually made up your mind, I suggest before you take the step to tell you partner it is over, firstly prepare, plan and then action.
You possibly have fears around what will happen once you say it is over, and in my experience things can get difficult. You may also be talked back into staying if you are not prepared with an action plan in place.
We plan for everything in life therefore it makes sense to plan a break up. The areas most important to consider are:-
- Electronic Privacy
- Who to tell
Ask anyone who has been through a break-up how the status quo changed once it was clear there would be no reconciliation. Ask any Separation Specialist or Lawyer and they will tell you that there is usually a window of around 4 months when things remain ‘amicable’ after that one or both parties tend to become acrimonious.
- Looking into ‘yours’ and ‘your partners’ finance which in fact = ‘our finances’ is not snooping, it is gathering the information necessary for a financial settlement.
- Don’t assume you electronic devises are safe from prying eyes, be careful what you send via the internet, emails, texts, social media.
- Special items could be damaged out of vindictive reasons
- Be private about what you are doing, this is not the time to share your intentions
- If there are any safety concerns for yourself, children or pets seek help
- Don’t under estimate your ex-partner reaction, but don’t let that concern stop you from leaving – just prepare for it
- Keep gathered information safe
By failing to prepare you are preparing to fail – Benjamin Franklin.
Forewarned is forearmed, having knowledge about any situation helps give you confidence and reduces your fears, concerns, overwhelm. The result will be that you will be able to make steadier decisions as you proceed.